FRUSTRATION! HAVE YOU EVER EXPERIENCED IT? Of course you have. Life has a way of presenting situations that try our souls! Just the other day, my wife and I were trying to reschedule a flight. Things went pretty smoothly until we tried to get the flight insurance transferred as well. Not so easy. Phone calls met with “holding.” Internet forms were extremely difficult to understand. Can you identify?
It was then that I remembered a message I had delivered called, “How to Live in Frustration City.” I thought perhaps I should get it out and re-read it to myself before I blow a gasket.
One summer, my wife and I were touring the Biltmore Mansion in Asheville, NC. It was very warm and we stopped at an ice cream stand on the grounds. We got in line a waited patiently for our turn. After about 15 minutes, I finally stepped up to the window to order, when all of a sudden, right before my eyes, the clerk closed the window, saying, “I’m sorry, but we’re closed for the day.” Talk about frustration!
All of us have had frustrating moments from time to time. For example:
❏ Inadequate time to do the things we want to do
❏ Not enough money at the end of the month
❏ Too much month at the end of the money
❏ Memory that often fails
❏ Family frustrations
❏ Job-related frustrations
❏ Caring for a sick relative
❏ Trying to reach someone for Christ
❏ Trying to break a habit
❏ Trying to lose weight.
Frustrations surfaces when...
❏ You put both contact lenses in the same eye
❏ Your wife says “Good morning, Bill” and your name is George.
❏ Your car horn goes off and remains stuck as you follow a group of Hells Angels.
❏ You buy $40 seats at a Detroit Lions game only to see them lose by 40 points.
❏ You hit a deer on your way home from purchasing your new car.
Unhealthy Ways of Dealing With Frustration
1. Bill your doctor for the time you spent in his waiting room.
2. Read the dictionary backwards and look for subliminal messages.
3. Drive to work in reverse
4. Pop some popcorn without the lid on
5. When someone tells you to have a nice day, tell them you have other plans
6. Use your Mastercard to pay your Visa bill.
Seriously, if we don’t get a grip on our frustrations, here’s what could happen:
1. We could lose our temper, and at the same time lose our influence.
2. We might give up, quit, resign (happens a lot in church), which in most cases leaves one with a feeling of failure.
3. We could go into depression.
4. We could become bitter and cynical
All around are people who are breaking down because they don’t possess the resources to endure the strains and pressures of every day living. So here a few practical suggestions.
Stay Focused … Identify the Problem. In the midst of a crisis (whether perceived or real) it's easy to lose our focus. We have to keep coming back to what the problems are and what we can do to solve them.
Keep in mind that frustration is an emotional reaction. It doesn't happen "out there", it happens inside us. And we have choice about whether we indulge it.
Be aware. Notice when you're feeling frustrated. Don't judge it. Blaming oneself, or others, will not work. Ninety percent of overcoming the problem is your conscious awareness that you're stressed. Ask yourself, "In three years' time, will this situation be worth being upset?" Chances are, it won't.
Stop. Get some exercise. Take a walk. Work out. Take a nap. Watch a movie. You'll be surprised how much more resourceful you can be after a break. In the whole scheme of things, how much difference will a few minutes (or hours) make?
Laugh a lot. We stress ourselves out by taking things too seriously. Being serious doesn't mean we have to be grim. Learn to laugh at yourself as well as the situation. The things that seem upsetting now will usually be things that we'll find humorous later. If we're going to laugh about it then, we might as well laugh about it now.
Ask else for help. Going through any challenging situation is more bearable and often more fun when we experience it with a friend or team member. Or how about God? Ask for help. Where is it written that you need to go it alone?
It was then that I remembered a message I had delivered called, “How to Live in Frustration City.” I thought perhaps I should get it out and re-read it to myself before I blow a gasket.
One summer, my wife and I were touring the Biltmore Mansion in Asheville, NC. It was very warm and we stopped at an ice cream stand on the grounds. We got in line a waited patiently for our turn. After about 15 minutes, I finally stepped up to the window to order, when all of a sudden, right before my eyes, the clerk closed the window, saying, “I’m sorry, but we’re closed for the day.” Talk about frustration!
All of us have had frustrating moments from time to time. For example:
❏ Inadequate time to do the things we want to do
❏ Not enough money at the end of the month
❏ Too much month at the end of the money
❏ Memory that often fails
❏ Family frustrations
❏ Job-related frustrations
❏ Caring for a sick relative
❏ Trying to reach someone for Christ
❏ Trying to break a habit
❏ Trying to lose weight.
Frustrations surfaces when...
❏ You put both contact lenses in the same eye
❏ Your wife says “Good morning, Bill” and your name is George.
❏ Your car horn goes off and remains stuck as you follow a group of Hells Angels.
❏ You buy $40 seats at a Detroit Lions game only to see them lose by 40 points.
❏ You hit a deer on your way home from purchasing your new car.
Unhealthy Ways of Dealing With Frustration
1. Bill your doctor for the time you spent in his waiting room.
2. Read the dictionary backwards and look for subliminal messages.
3. Drive to work in reverse
4. Pop some popcorn without the lid on
5. When someone tells you to have a nice day, tell them you have other plans
6. Use your Mastercard to pay your Visa bill.
Seriously, if we don’t get a grip on our frustrations, here’s what could happen:
1. We could lose our temper, and at the same time lose our influence.
2. We might give up, quit, resign (happens a lot in church), which in most cases leaves one with a feeling of failure.
3. We could go into depression.
4. We could become bitter and cynical
All around are people who are breaking down because they don’t possess the resources to endure the strains and pressures of every day living. So here a few practical suggestions.
Stay Focused … Identify the Problem. In the midst of a crisis (whether perceived or real) it's easy to lose our focus. We have to keep coming back to what the problems are and what we can do to solve them.
Keep in mind that frustration is an emotional reaction. It doesn't happen "out there", it happens inside us. And we have choice about whether we indulge it.
Be aware. Notice when you're feeling frustrated. Don't judge it. Blaming oneself, or others, will not work. Ninety percent of overcoming the problem is your conscious awareness that you're stressed. Ask yourself, "In three years' time, will this situation be worth being upset?" Chances are, it won't.
Stop. Get some exercise. Take a walk. Work out. Take a nap. Watch a movie. You'll be surprised how much more resourceful you can be after a break. In the whole scheme of things, how much difference will a few minutes (or hours) make?
Laugh a lot. We stress ourselves out by taking things too seriously. Being serious doesn't mean we have to be grim. Learn to laugh at yourself as well as the situation. The things that seem upsetting now will usually be things that we'll find humorous later. If we're going to laugh about it then, we might as well laugh about it now.
Ask else for help. Going through any challenging situation is more bearable and often more fun when we experience it with a friend or team member. Or how about God? Ask for help. Where is it written that you need to go it alone?
posted by kazookid | 4:23 PM
1 Comments:
Welcome back to semi-retirement and time to write on your blog again. I always enjoy reading your posts.
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